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Credit and Debt 14 Apr 2006 01:20 pm

(Poke) Ow!, (Poke) Ow!, (Poke) Ow!… Mom… Debt collectors keeps poking me!

I have some substantial credit card debt that I’d love to pay, but simply can’t. As such I find no reason to talk to collection agency representative as they don’t believe anything I have to say anyways. So it’s completely futile to even answer their calls. Thankfully my cellphone is really great with its caller ID as all my friends and family show up as their named selves and the collection agencies and law firms come up under “blocked” or “unknown caller.” This is of course secret code for Don’t Answer. Some will come up under a real number, but I’ve taken to only answering calls from number I know. So all those dollars being spent trying to contact me are sadly fruitless. They get my machine and I delete the messages soon as I hear Stern Voice or my full legal name–which no one I know uses so it’s always someone “official.”

I just got a new style of message, it was something like “We have an important personal matter in our office that matters greatly to you but because we respect your privacy we will not discuss it here…” and it goes on. The message was obviously a generic recording that their Dialtron 5000 spits out when voice mail is gotten, and it was a perfect example of Stern Voice.

I wonder if collections agencies just use a voice actor. One day doing collection call messages the next doing laundry soap voice overs or something. Even though I don’t feel threatened by the collection agency I do get a little uneasy by the mere sound of the voice. And it’s always a man’s voice too. In our highly sexist society I suppose women aren’t able or allowed to sound authoritative.

There was a second message shortly thereafter, from the same voice saying, “Because you have not responded to people from this office I am taking the time to call you personally because this is a critical matter you need to address now…” Sure dude! I’m trembling here in my own dripping wet stupidity. Couldn’t they have used another voice actor since that same voice left me a message shortly before as an office worker? And could they make it sound less recorded so that it’s actually sound personal?

So do people really fall for these calls and wonder if they’ve won something, or that random companies are going to ask them important questions out of the blue. “Excuse me ma’am, we’re calling you to inquire if our new Big Business Venture, a joint partnership, is a good idea. We just wanted you to green light this before we proceed.” Do people know they are creditors and are so afraid of not calling and suffering some voodoo curse that they just call despite obviously trying to ignore them? Are people being fooled? They’re so obviously transparent that I must assume it’s just a fear factor issue.

Collection agencies keep records of their last contact with you. Various rules exist for when a debt will simply be written off and discharged for lack of progress in collecting the debt. So it’s in their interest to have contact with you no matter of what sort it is. Phone calls, letters, payments. It’s all the same. Since I have no money to give I see no reason to talk to them. They never listened to my offers or believe anything I’ve ever said so I take no interest in communicating with them. I have absolutely no assets to seize in court, no wages to garnish so outside of them tarnishing my already wretched credit history. At best I’ll hit their limit and the debt will be discharge and at worst I delete messages.

I generally assume when someone or something has a long standing practice that such behavior exists for a reason–that it works. So I’ll assume the debt collection industry has a good history with threatening people in anyway legally possible. It’s a highly regulated industry that is no longer allowed to make harsh threat or harass, but this latest example of Stern Voice sounded like a master talking to a disobedient and dim witted dog. It was macho-stupidity stinking up all over the place. The kind of tone that if someone talked to me like that in real life I’d get all adrenalinized and ready to fight of flight. Or I’d laugh at them and goad the person a bit. If I’m not in danger of negative repercussions I’m quite entertained to help someone work themselves up unnecessarily. This is especially joyful if there the person’s girlfriend is nearby, so that we can exchange glances. She gives me the “I’m sorry he’s being so stupid” looks and I throw back the “and you put up with this” face.

6 Responses to “(Poke) Ow!, (Poke) Ow!, (Poke) Ow!… Mom… Debt collectors keeps poking me!”

  1. on 05 May 2006 at 8:28 am 1.mary said …

    Collection agency employees are trained to bully the “deadbeats”. I’ve had many convesations with them, and even considered it as job for myself as well. But I’m not into bullying. The new thing with Credit Card debt is Lawyers (or others?) buy the debt you owe. They then do all the required paper work, red tape, to comply with the law. If you don’t show up in court, the judgement is issued against you. Forget how many years they have to collect the court issued judgement. If you ever get back on your feet after this process, they can collect much more than was originally owed. Don’t think they have debtors jails anymore.

  2. on 05 May 2006 at 8:19 pm 2.April said …

    There’s a big difference between being stern and bullying. One’s legal the other isn’t necessarily. Consumer protection acts prohibit abusive behavior from collectors but the law speaks more specifically to threats and actions and not necessarily about things like tone of voice or innuendo. So they can pretty safely push into the grey areas knowing it’d be hard for it to come back to bite them.

    A friend of mine had her debt sold to a new collection agency and the person assigned to her case was clearly being abusive. It only took a few calls before she lost her cool and starting just talking back over the guy and reading to him verbatim from various relevant sections of the law that illustrate the illegality of his tactics. And she knew them too as she used to be a bill collector for a classified ads publisher.

    Forget how many years they have to collect the court issued judgement.

    The term is limited and varies by state and type of credit originally issued.

    Don’t think they have debtors jails anymore.

    Not in the US anyways, but I’m sure some folks would like to see them put back in place.

  3. on 18 May 2007 at 10:33 am 3.Yoda said …

    Well, maybe it’s just me, but I’m in exactly the same boat. I found out that if you forward all your mail to a UPS store mailbox that once your contract with UPS expires they WILL NOT forward your mail to you. That clears your postal world of annoying credit letters.

    I no longer answer calls from creditors. They show up on my cellphone ID as “asshole” or “annoyance” cause I have a feature that allows me to label incoming calls.

    When I do talk to them I play dumb or annoying myself. When they ask for FULL LEGAL NAME I tell the collector that FULL LEGAL NAME was abducted by aliens last night but that, by proxy I’m allowed to handle her affairs. Is this an affair? I ask. Are you sleeping with FULL LEGAL NAME? Why are you trying to get money from her? Are you qualified to get money from her? How do I know you aren’t a clever identity thief? Do you have a GED? What are your qualifications for being a stern voiced asshole? What are they paying you at this job? How long have you been employed with this company? Can you tell me about a time you’ve been kind to a deadbeat? How can you afford to live on minimum wage yourself? Do you have any financial tips? I bet you have day old sphagetti sitting in the company fridge right now and half a dozen unpaid bills yourself don’t you? And you’re calling ME to demand money?

    Dude - where’s your wife right now? I bet you’re one of those controlling wife beater types and take some sort of sick pleasure in harrassing me. Well, I’m not going to stand for your shitty, skinny-dick attitude. I demand to speak to your supervisor!

    Hey - it’s a great way to practice your assertiveness skills.

    Have fun. Free yourself from stern voice and be Amazon woman. I do.

  4. on 16 Jul 2007 at 9:28 pm 4.Yvonne said …

    I got a secured (with $500 in a special account) “credit” card last December and have been using it and making more than the minimum payments to get back on track credit-wise.

    This time it’s working: there are no shenanigans going on from their end.

    I had a secured card several years ago from a schlock credit card company called Providian, and the company that took over trying to collect from me for them are trying to stick me with over $1000. Well, the card was SECURED, HELLLLO! with $300 or $400. How did it get to over $1000? Interest? I didn’t buy anything or get cash advances that put it over the secured amount.

    The statute of limitations runs out on the greedy Providian minions soon. Meanwhile I’m going to send “dispute” letters to the credit reporting agencies and hopefully get these “negatives” removed from my credit reports since they are not “fair credit reporting”. I could see it if I was out there BUYING STUFF, but that isn’t me. I’m on the frugal side.

    On the other hand we’re dealing with very SLICK tricksters. I made a call to that credit card company to ask a question about my bill and they put me on hold and played a recorded message about some offer.

    When the rep came on the line I made an inquiry about the offer but decided I would pass and told her I wasn’t interested in buying whatever it was. Do you know she told me that it had been put through as a charge at some point in our conversation, but all I had to do (some nerve!) was to send the thing I would get in the mail back and the charge would be removed!

    I discontinued dealing with them after that and I assumed they would just keep the security account money. In retrospect I wish I had sent them a letter to that effect, but at the time I was involved in some very unhappy family stuff and from that perspective I just didn’t have the emotional energy to be Ms. Handle Every Single Thing.

    A MAJOR bank that shall remain nameless is also claiming that I overdrew my SAVINGS account(!) and owe them over $900. PUHLEASE!

    I will eventually get this financial thing down. Why in the HELL wasn’t personal financial management a REQUIRED course in high school?! Given what’s going on in the housing foreclosure industry I think the BIG MONEY PEOPLE, contrary to what they claim, are making rather than losing money from those of us who fall from grace credit-wise. If our lack of financial savvy were truly costing them, their own self-interest would prompt them to see to it that we had the information we need BEFORE we made credit misteps, don’t you think?

  5. on 27 Feb 2008 at 11:48 am 5.John Warrenton-Smythe said …

    Too bad you’re feeling hassled, but I don’t feel too sorry for you. My wife and I racked up a substantial amount of credit card debt while in graduate school (about $44,000). That was above and beyond student loan debt. After almost six years of repayment, there is only about $3000 left to be paid (a few more months). We incurred the debt, we benefitted from the purchases we made (including grocercies), now we’re paying the piper. I have never been late with a payment - ever. We have done without a lot of “extras” for the last six years to make good on our debt. We purchased a cheap home that has required many repairs, and both drive 20-year-old cars that I maintain myself. No fancy home, no fancy cars, no big-screen televisions, no cable-tv, just essentials while we pay off our debts. Any purhcases we make we make with cash - no new debt. If we had simply defaulted on our debts or declared bankruptcy, we’d be sitting pretty and enjoying all the goodies that we bought with money that wasn’t ours. The problem is that if you get a bunch of stuff and don’t pay for it, that’s theft. That’s why I go to work every day, and pay off the debts I’ve incurred. If you don’t, you deserve to at least receive “stern” phone calls.

  6. on 11 May 2008 at 7:43 am 6.Yoda said …

    Todd, I DO feel sorry for you. What a smug ass-wipe you are. Not everyone has the same circumstances you and your lovely wife do. Some of us have medical bills that not only kick our butts, but insurance companies who won’t pay them. Maybe you don’t have a SIGNIFICANT MEDICAL problem now, but give yourself time. Perhaps if both of you were out of work and couldn’t find work and used your credit cards to finance medication or food or gas you might see things differently. You’ve been good little do-bees, but I guess you’ve had stability, bosses who don’t screw with you, a stable work history and an incredible anal-retentive quality that not only allows you to budget well, but gives you just enough arrogant righteousness to sh*t on other people’s parades. Not all of us who are broke are “getting a bunch of stuff” without paying for it. Most of the folks I know in financial straits are there because of medical bills, bad employers, health issues or conditions beyond the common consumerism driven materialism you seem to equate with debt. Get a life Todd. You obviously really need one.

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